This funny and amusingly offensive mockumentary series centers around the world of children’s beauty pageants (the “Miss Stars Eyes Pagaent” to be precise).  The setup goes like this: Michael Champagne (Sam Pancake) is the very proud, if not a little “swishy” father to Annette (Stacy McQueen), our little pageant princess (who happens to be played by an adult).  Michale is married to Ribina (Dee Freeman), the professional smoker that supports the family, who is fooling around every chance she gets with Michael’s brother, Ethan (Troy Conrad).  Whew.

It’s written and directed by Steve Silverman, who says, “It’s ‘Little Miss Sunshine’ meets ‘Reno 911′ meets everything that’s politically incorrect, but just a whole heck of a lot of fun to say out loud in the world today.”

The laughs (and the series) officially launches today, February 1st.  But episodes can be pulled up online all day everyday at their website, www.prettytheseries.com.

Here’s the official trailer to tease you a little…

I just couldn’t get into it the book though, try as I might.  And well, I never bothered to track down the original blog (it is still out there). Thankfully, the Julie & Julia movie opens today – and yes, I do plan to make one of the early screenings.

Now I’ll be the first to admit that I rarely find movies based on books to be even half as good as the books their based on.  I hear from a few friends that got to see an advanced screening, that this time around that I’ll be pleasantly surprised.  I’m really looking forward to it.

I love how Sony Pictures paid their respects to the current world of food bloggers.  My friend’s blog, Dine and Dish, was one of the featured food blogs on the Julie & Julia official site on July 9th.  I’m sure it was a difficult decision to narrow down all the incredible food blogs out there, to select just 30. How cool is that?

For those food lovers out there who are ready to gobble up Julie & Julia when it hits theaters today. Hollywood.com has the exclusive look into acclaimed chef Rocco DiSpirito’s top 5 movies for foodies as well as 15 questions with Meryl Streep, who plays Julia Child in the film. Some of DiSpirito’s picks include “Like Water Like Chocolate” and “Babette’s Feast.”

With the fifth installment of the Harry Potter movie franchise – Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix – in theaters right now, and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows — the seventh and final book of the series poised to hit shelves on Saturday, the excitement of people across the country – young and old – has reached a fever pitch. Order of the Phoenix grossed $44 million in its first day of release, the highest opening Wednesday gross ever for a movie. Deathly Hallows is the number one seller on Amazon and has sold more pre-orders at Barnes and Noble than any other title in the chain’s history. Midnight release parties have been planned. The internet is rife with rumors, speculation and spoilers, some credible, and some not so much.

More…All the furor leaves many adults – those poor, benighted souls who haven’t read Harry Potter – scratching their heads. “It’s just a kids’ book,” they say. “Those books are so long,” they say. “It’s about wizards?”

I myself am a card carrying member of the Harry Potter fan club. I’m not going to any midnight release parties, but I did pre-order my copy of the Deathly Hallows from Amazon MONTHS ago. I consider myself an early adopter – I read the first three books back in 1999 shortly after they were released in the US – and I have converted many (including my husband, who initially scoffed at me, and has spent the last month rereading all the books in the series in anticipation of the Deathly Hallows) into Potterphilia. As such, I consider it a duty, nay, a mission, to offer up the following:

TOP FIVE REASONS WHY YOU (YES, YOU), A THINKING ADULT, SHOULD READ HARRY POTTER

5. Harry Potter is Interesting. J.K. Rowling didn’t just plunk some wizards down in modern or mythical Britain, give them wands and call it a day. The wizarding world she created, while co-existing with our world, is complete to the smallest detail, from their educational system, to their government, to how they cook dinner. The level of detail in the books is marvelous – wizards don’t collect baseball cards that come with a pack of gum – they collect wizard cards that come with a chocolate frog. Newspaper photos in the wizarding world move and talk. To read the Harry Potter books is akin to reading a travel narrative or an anthropological study – you are totally immersed in another world.

4. Harry Potter is Universal. Liked Lord of the Rings? What about Star Wars? The Harry Potter books draw from the same universal archetypal myths: the hero, the quest, the underdog, the battle against evil. These themes are familiar, yet can always be reinvented. They help the Harry Potter books strike a chord in nearly all of their readers. The Harry Potter Books are above all about coming of age – of the movement from childhood (which is not idealized, but holds its own pain and terrors) to the sadder, more complex world of adulthood. That’s something we can all relate to.

3. Harry Potter is Literary. Anyone who has studied literature in general, or English literature in particular, is going to recognize certain tropes which place Harry Potter firmly in the canon of British literature. The orphaned hero, placed in the care of neglectful, slatternly guardians (very Dickensian, or maybe Jane Eyre), is rescued by an aging, wise mentor, and finds himself a special role to play (King Arthur anyone? What about Tolkien? (or X-men)). Rowling addresses the class conflicts that are pervasive in British literature from George Eliot to Evelyn Waugh, with the clash of the “Purebloods” versus the “Mudbloods” and the “Blood Traitors.” She even brings in the old English conflict between the Normans and the Saxons (Ivanhoe), giving the good characters stout, Anglo-Saxon names, like “Longbottom”, “Weasley”, and “Dumbledore,” while the baddies are all Norman French “Lestrange”, “Malfoy” and of course, “Voldemort.” Kids miss all this stuff. Adults appreciate it.

2. Harry Potter is Complex. One of the arguments I often hear adults make against children’s books is that they are too simplistic. While the Potterverse has its fixed poles of good‘uns and bad’uns (for your reference, Harry is good, Voldemort is evil), the characters and the world in which they exist is not so clear cut. Harry’s beloved long-lost parents show streaks of adolescent cruelty; the wizarding government, in attempting to confront evil from outside, is subject to corruption from within and overstepping its power (sound familiar?); and Harry himself is a teenager – prone to boorishness, an inability to control his temper, and short-sightedness. Then there is Severus Snape – a possible double agent, but nobody knows (until Saturday) whose side he is really on. The world of Harry Potter, like our own, is not a simple one, and with adulthood for Harry comes the growing realization that things are not always black and white.

1. Harry Potter is Good. It’s just a great read. The books are packed with adventure, humor, tragedy and romance. Grown women have been known to immerse themselves totally in the books, pausing only for air and sustenance, or to squeal with delight in anticipation of the next volume.

I guess you could call them … magical.

AmuseBouche

As you may or may not have heard, in a promotional stunt to support the upcoming July 27th, Simpsons’ movie, a few select 7-eleven stores have gone through a complete overhaul. Here in the Los Angeles area, we lay claim to three new Kwik-E-Marts (Burbank, Culver City and Mountain View). I may not be that big of a Simpsons fan, but of course I had to stop by first chance I got.

They did a great job and really thought of everything. Everywhere you looked the signage was all about the Simpsons, right down to the smallest detail like the receipts and the donation collection boxes at the register. Even the trash cans had new store stickers.

Talk about marketing genius. When has another product ever taken over a nationally recognized name brand like this? I think this ad campaign might go down in marketing history.

The temporary Kwik-E-Marts are selling items that until now existed only on television: Buzz Cola, Krusty O’s cereal, the slushy drink, Slurpee-knockoffs called Squishees, sprinkle-loaded, pink-frosted donuts and of all things, Styrofoam Kwik-E-Mart coolers. Of course, I had to try a Squishee and a donut. Can you blame me?

The place was packed, but everyone was in good spirits. Folks had their arms full of Squishees, Buzz and pink donuts, all while trying to take pictures. There were plenty of uniformed volunteers on staff to help answer any questions or to offer to help take pictures with Homer, Apu, or Chief Wiggum. I found out later that at various times throughout the day, there were lines around the building just waiting to get inside – even in our 90+ degree heat.

I had only planned to pick up a thing or two for some upcoming, teenager birthday gifts, so I kept it simple with a six-pack of Buzz cola and some fruit chews. I was hoping to pick up some Krusty O’s but they were sold out both times I stopped by. The manager, Apu (according to his name tag) assured me that there was a delivery expected any minute, but I wasn’t about to wait. I would have loved to have picked up a six-pack of Duff’s beer for my brother-in-law’s birthday, but no beer was to be found (turned out it kind of went against their PG-13 ratings, so they opted to skip it – I was kind of bummed, but oh well).

The U.S. locations where a 7-Eleven store was transformed into a Kwik-E-Mart are New York City; Chicago; Dallas; Denver; Burbank; Los Angeles; Henderson, Nev.; Orlando; Mountain View, CA; Seattle; and Bladensburg, MD. For more information, check out seeyellow.com. Hurry though, the Kwik-E-Marts will only be around until the end of the month. But don’t worry about missing out on all this Simpson’s goodness, all over the US and Canada, 7-elevens will be carrying the Simpson line, pink donuts and all, until they run out (or so Apu told me – he’s such a friendly guy).

Still more photos from my visit can be found in our Flickr set.

Katy

Ratatouille
Pixar does it again! The animation wizards do not disappoint with their latest film, a heartwarming and hilarious romp through Parisian kitchens starring a little blue rat named Remy. Remy is no ordinary rat. He’s a gourmand. He eschews garbage and creates culinary delights formed from stolen spices and fresh herbs. When he accidentally ends up in the kitchen at Gusteau’s, a grand dame of Parisian cuisine, he witnesses a young apprentice chef destroying the house soup. Remy can’t help but correct the mistake, and soon afterward he and the awkward, talentless Linguini are making beautiful food together. This is a tale of friendship, ambition and acceptance. From beginning to end, you’ll care about these characters, delight in their passions and hope for their success. The animation is gorgeous, truly doing justice to the beautiful city of Paris and the energy of a French kitchen. This movie is exactly what a good summer movie should be: a visual spectacle featuring characters that will make you laugh and cause you to leave the theatre with a smile. It doesn’t get better than that.

Once
Every now and then, a little movie comes along and steals your heart. That’s exactly what Once does, and it’s the surprising delight of the summer. Never heard of it? That’s because it was made for practically pennies, starring two musicians you’ve never heard of and shot entirely on location in Ireland. The film tells the story of a young guy and girl, both struggling, aspiring musicians in Dublin. The guy repairs vacuum cleaners by day and sings his heart out on Grafton Street at night. The girl works as a maid and struggles to raise her young daughter while stealing moments to practice piano in the back of a music shop. When these two meet, the chemistry is immediate. Soon, they are at work recording a demo and falling in love. The palpable attraction between the two is no joke; they became a couple in real life while shooting this film. Even more inspiring is the music they create: soaring, haunting melodies that permeate the movie, sending the viewer into a dreamlike state. It’s not quite like anything you’ve ever seen; it’s better. You will not be able to get this music or these people out of your head when you leave the theatre. This is a gem of a film, perhaps the seminal music film of a generation and certainly the most touching romance to grace the screen in years.

Sicko
This is not a feel good movie. You’re not going to leave the theatre happy after seeing Sicko. However, Sicko is Michael Moore’s best and most effective documentary since Roger & Me and it shines a light on an important American issue that every last one of us should be concerned about. Obviously, Michael Moore is a polarizing figure in our world. Some people won’t go see his movies, just because he makes them. That’s their right, and I’m not trying to convince them otherwise. However, I think this movie is extremely important because it has the potential to jumpstart a national dialogue on the state of our ineffective healthcare system. Moore does not give himself as much screen time here as he has in previous films. I think that ultimately works for the movie and Sicko becomes more about the issues than the director. It’s still filled with Moore’s trademark bombastic stunts (like taking the ailing 9/11 workers to Cuba), but if you look beyond the bluster, there’s a lot of important information in this film. Sicko is a call to action, one that will have you thinking and talking about health care issues long after you leave the theatre. It is heady stuff for summer, but it’s about time the conversation was initiated.

Rosebud

Fiber One bars – Ever since hearing about these babies on HungryGirl.com I had to check them out. You see, with our wacky schedule, I tend to do bars for breakfast. These are so good that even the hubby will eat them (which says a lot to how they’re not overly sweet since he can’t stand how sweet most other granola/breakfast bar products can be). They weigh in at a mere 140 calories with 9 grams of fiber (that’s only 2 WW points!). They’re so filling that they really do satisfy. I like the chocolate better than the peanut butter (this one is 3 WW points), but to each their own. This is our new goto travel snack food.

Aquaphor – I discovered Aquaphor when my dermatologist gave me some samples after I got badly burned during a facial. I have to say, not only did it help to clear up my burn nicely, but it’s a multi-purpose product and perfect to keep a trial size stashed in your purse, briefcase or desk. It’s great on burns and it’s awesome on dry, itchy skin. But even better, it’s fantastic as a lip balm. I like to use it before going for long walks or working out or at night before bed. It can stay on an hour or longer and that, to this lip balm addict is just awesome!

Redken Ringlet07 Curl Perfector – I’ve been using various curl-friendly styling products since middle school. I have to say, this is the first product that I’ve ever found that leaves my hair with soft, touchable curls. There are no crunchy curls here!! *warning* the pump, like most pumps will occasionally clog up a bit which often results in an unwanted spurt to the belly (I’ll let you use your own dirty mind here), but at least it won’t stain that blue dress.

Coke Zero – I am one of those crazy folks that loves water. I mean, I can guzzle it down like it’s my favorite drink. That said, I do love me some Coke Zero. I was never a huge fan of bottled or canned Diet Coke (yet I loved fountain Diet Coke – must be the syrup). But once I tried Coke Zero, I was hooked! And even better, they now make a Cherry Coke Zero!!! Oh happy day!

Netflix – I’ve never been one of those people that has to see every new movie. In fact, I probably only go to the movies about 3-4 times a year at most. We don’t have any of the cable movie channels and for at least five or more years I didn’t even have cable tv. Needless to say, I’ve missed out on some good stuff. So now, with my bargain basement Netflix account I can finally catch up on movies and television shows that I never got around to seeing. I finally know who Carrie chose in SATC and who won the presidency on West Wing (we had a lot going on this last season and we missed the last half of the season). We’ve also been able to catch up those guys over on Entourage. Next on the list for this summer’s hiatus…finishing up Veronica Mars, starting House and Arrested Development and checking out what movies my friends recommend.

Katy

1. The Departed
2. Little Miss Sunshine
3. Dreamgirls
4. The Queen
5. Little Children
6. The Good Shepherd
7. Letters from Iwo Jima
8. Hollywoodland
9. Thank You For Smoking
10. An Inconvenient Truth

The top spot on my list goes to The Departed, Martin Scorsese’s masterful film about undercover work in the Massachusetts State Police and the Irish Mafia in Boston. The intricate and air tight plot is compelling and the acting is tremendous. I love the fact that at this late date in his career, Scorsese can make a Mafia movie that feels different and fresh, one that doesn’t rely on old clichés. The Departed had me on the edge of my seat, and I hope that Scorsese will finally get his long-deserved Oscar for this effort.
Second place goes to Little Miss Sunshine, one of the biggest and most surprising comedy hits of the year. This is a small movie that did big box office based primarily on positive word of mouth. That doesn’t happen every day. It’s a unique, hilarious and endearing film that combines laugh out loud moments with genuine emotion.
Dreamgirls surprised me. I’m not the biggest fan of musicals, but this one really works. The film is buoyed by the magnificent performance of Jennifer Hudson. Her name is on everyone’s lips as Oscar nominations approach, and deservedly so.
The Queen is a behind the scenes look at the interaction between Queen Elizabeth II and Prime Minister Tony Blair in the week following Princess Diana’s death. It’s completely engrossing and fascinating; the actors are so mesmerizing in their roles that you completely forget you’re watching actors at all. Helen Mirren is going to win Best Actress for her performance in this film, I’d bet money on it.
At fifth place on my list, Little Children is a dynamic film about two self-absorbed suburban parents and a community reacting to a pedophile in their midst. It’s a elegant morality tale, directed by the very talented Todd Field (“In the Bedroom”) and filled with moments of despair, irony and wicked humor.
My list continues with The Good Shepherd, a lengthy but very solid film about a career CIA agent (well played by Matt Damon) and Letters from Iwo Jima, Clint’s Eastwood’s wrenching film showing the battle of Iwo Jima from the perspective of the doomed Japanese. Also notable for me this year is Hollywoodland, a surprisingly emotional movie based on the sad life of George Reeves, television’s first Superman. In eighth position, Thank You for Smoking is a bitingly funny film whose protagonist is an unapologetic lobbyist for the tobacco industry. Finally, in tenth place, An Inconvenient Truth, the movie that woke up our country this year, got everyone talking about climate change and proved that even a simple Power Point presentation can be powerful in the hands of a good director.
My runner-up awards would go to United 93, The Matador, Borat, Cars and Monster House, great movies that didn’t quite make my Top 10.
Caveat: There are a still a number of movies that I have not seen which could be contenders for a place on this Top 10 List. These include The Last King of Scotland, Half Nelson, The Fountain, Shut Up & Sing, Volver, Pan’s Labyrinth and The Death of Mr. Lazarescu.

Rosebud

This by itself is unpleasant but not entirely unsurprising. I mean, obviously his career has kind of tanked since his heyday if you will of Screechdom. While Mark-Paul Gosselaar (aka the cute one) went on to NYPD Blue, and Tiffani Amber Thiessen had a good run on Beverly Hills 90210, poor Dustin has been stuck on the D-list comedy circuit. Heck, even Mario Lopez has kept his face on TV- it may have been on a bad knockoff of the View, and Dancing with the Stars, but it’s still work. Dustin, in the meantime, has apparently descended into the pit of bitterness and “what happened” entitlement complex otherwise known as “Former Child Star-Itis”. It’s a bad case, too. If you don’t believe me, you can go to his website and see for yourself. Yes, he is selling T-shirts to pay for his mortgage, and his woe is me tale is chock full of Gary Coleman/ Danny Bonaduce crazy goodness.

But I digress. The point is, he seems to have sunk to a real low in order to keep his name in the spotlight. His tape, if you believe the hype, contains an act that is just disgusting, nasty, and vile. By itself it is those things; Screech performing them adds “vomitous” to the mix. Screech performing it on tape elevates it to the rank of “If I watch that, I will have to dunk my head in a vat of bleach and pull my brains out my ears with a knitting needle to erase the memory.” It’s an act with its very own name, one you may or may not recognize. To protect the innocent I will omit the actual name, but it rhymes with “Dirty Tan Chaise.” If curiosity is overwhelming you, you can always google the name of the purported tape- I kid you not, they are calling it “Saved By the Smell.” If that doesn’t give you a hint that perhaps this is not something you want to Google, then you are beyond my help.

Usually when you hear about a celebrity sex tape, I think most people are at least a wee bit curious, right? Like, maybe you wouldn’t pay the $20 or whatever for a Night in Paris, or the John Wayne Bobbitt tape, but if a friend had it in the DVD player you’d take a peek. I need better friends. I still haven’t seen any of them, even the infamous Tommy Lee one, but if it was there, I would. But if this thing was playing, I tell you what, I would run. After sprinkling the TV with holy water. Blindfolded. This definitely heralds the arrival of the celebrities you didn’t want to see naked sex tapes. I guess it was bound to happen. What’s next? Urkel does Uranus? (insert collective groan. Yes, I wrote this whole paragraph just so I could write that one thing.)

There is one winner in this whole debacle, though, and that is Elizabeth Berkley. The infamous “Showgirls” star has finally relinquished her 11 year crown as “Most Embarrassing Saved By the Bell Alum”. Bravo, Elizabeth.

Apparently I’ve been living in a cave all summer. I only recently heard about the lonelygirl15 / youtube phenomenon, and LA Times staff writer Richard Rushfield insinuates that the only plausible explanation is recess-dwelling. I think that’s his way of making himself, & the millions of others like him who’ve fallen down this rabbit hole, feel better about their obsession with the videoblog of an unknown 15-yr old girl. She’s home-schooled in a small town and is very sheltered, in part, she says, because of her family’s religion. That she’s cute goes without saying. In other words, she’s every compu-geek’s fantasy. Just to emphasize this point, her sidekick in this drama is compu-geek Daniel, or as she calls him on her YouTube page, “Computer Genius.”

No, there’s no new license for public fantasizing about underage girls. In fact, Bree, as she calls herself, has a female fan base that’s just as dedicated as the males. With an adorable, animated face, a “Purple Monkey” hand puppet, and the hint of a life just different enough to catch our attention, she joined the YouTube world with her first blog in June. The videos are short, mundane clips of a too-clean bedroom with a bed on the right side of the screen, and bookcase with candelabra on the left. She introduces herself as a shy young girl holding her knee, but it doesn’t take long for her to open up & display her feather boa, or to read seconds-long passages from her school-books

“The ancient Roman’s were the Western World’s only known cannibals. At the height of the Roman Empire, one of the greatest delicacies was flesh cut from a life slave – eww! – who was in the room to watch himself being eaten. Eeeewww. That’s really gross. I’m really glad I didn’t live in those days.”

Very slowly she begins to reveal bits and pieces of her apparently not-so-mundane life, with allusions to having “certain beliefs” which mean she “can’t do the same things as other kids, all the time.”

There was little question of her authenticity in the beginning, but as her video library expanded & her cult following grew, everything she said or did was called into question. The lighting is just a little too perfect. The lines are a little too glib. The production is a little too smooth. The story became a little too consuming. And thus explains the obsession. It’s not with her, per se, but with the compounding mysteries surrounding who she is. It’s become one giant, collective puzzle to occupy the waning weeks of summer: Who is she? Who created her? Why was she created? Everyone not living in a cave is able to come together and flesh out the clues that explain both her story & her existence. It’s the epitome of the internet, proving that people from all walks of life can work peacefully together toward a common goal. In fact, the finale of this first act culminated in the scheming of a 36-yr old software engineer, a 23-yr old law student and an 18-yr old college freshman, which produced proof of who Bree is – or at least who she isn’t.

Part of the fuel for this obsession was introduced about a month ago, when the weird picture above her candelabra was positively identified as the famous occultist Aleister Crowley. Then she begins talking about participating in a very important religious ceremony. A few weeks later, the Purple Monkey rates her cookies with a 10, 12 & 06. Some astute fans quickly shared that Crowley’s birthday is October 12th, and suddenly her allusions to the occult were analyzed under a microscope (see above reference to cannibalism. She says it at least another 3 times). It’s conjectured that she’s part of a marketing campaign for a horror movie, a la Blair Witch Project. This whole puzzle, in fact, bares a striking resemblance to William Gibson’s Pattern Recognition.

If you haven’t entered this foray yet, don’t. At least that’s what all the blogs say. On some half-witted conscious level they know the obsession with this puzzle is playing right into someone’s hands. They also know it’s more addicting than Soduku, and now that summer’s over, we’re supposed to actually be getting something accomplished. But for anyone who dares, the blogs are full of links to take you through the mystery, starting with Bree’s most ardent supporter, NY Times Virginia Heffernan. Hope you have some extra time on your hands.